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A Counselor's counselor

Posted on Sat Feb 25th, 2012 @ 4:15pm by Lieutenant Alexander Bakura

Mission: The Wonders of SB 94
Location: Jeremy's office
Timeline: after jer's return from starbase

Though he really had no business going to his office, as he was still relieved of duty, Jeremy still did after sharing a meal with Noah on starbase. The captain had to go off to his meetings, leaving Jeremy and their son behind to return to the ship, or explore the base at their own leisure.

Not really comfortable with being on his own, Jeremy opted to return to the ship and just clean up his office, for routine's sake. Putting Altair in his playpen in the corner, Jeremy sat down behind his desk and started to sort his files. He knew Naois didn't use this office, preferring to use his own quarters. Jeremy was much the same, but his quarters also being the CO's quarters, that wasn't really an option.

Soon enough, the young counselor was engrossed in cleaning up, happily wielding a damp cloth to clean up the smooth surfaces of his furniture.

Bee-boop.

The door chimed unexpectedly.

Started, Jeremy turned and just stared at the door. "Come?" he called hesitantly, not really sure who to expect. He wasn't supposed to be here, he wasn't supposed to go anywhere near his office, but he wasn't seeing patients, was he? He had kept to that restriction, he hadn't been talking to anyone, professionally speaking. No recordings, no notes, nothing. He blinked as a white-haired officer walked in, someone he'd never met before. "Uhm...I think you should come back later sir, I'm not doing any evaluations of new personnel at the moment. Counselor Mercy will be on duty in a few hours sir."

The young Lieutenant didn't answer at first, his eyes seeming to scrutinise the room closely.

"Now that is a nice couch!" he exclaimed quite genuinely, "May I?" he was going to sit anyway but he thought he may as well fake some courtesy at least before dropping heavily on to the soft leather recliner.

Again, the young Trill blinked as the other man dropped down before even awaiting an answer. "Uhm..sure, help yourself? What is your name sir, perhaps I should note it down for Lieutenant Mercy so he can page you? Are you tired? Perhaps the quartermaster could uhm...assign you first?"

"Oh don't worry about that, I have my assignment right here." he replied, fidgeting with the satchel that had clattered loudly with the impact. "For you young sir." he smiled handing the Trill a Padd.

"Me?" Confusion crossed his spotted features, his face flushing a little greener. He didn't read the PADD, just stared at his visitor instead. "I think you should give this to the captain sir, I'm not authorised to accept any orders. I'm relieved of duty."

"Do please read the Padd. Lieutenant." Alex insisted, everything will make sense then.

Still confused, Jeremy activated the PADD and accessed the file on it. Quickly, he browsed through the file, before looking up. "Seems like this office is yours for a while then sir," he offered. "I've been waiting for someone to ah...come see me. I've been anxious to, I'll admit. I really want this to be sorted out, because I'm really afraid it may happen again sir."

"That's okay lieutenant, I'm not here for the office, though I may apply for a transfer of couches." He stretched out his body. "But I am indeed here to fix you, I believe I have a certain level of expertise in this particular field."

"Oh?" Jeremy looked up in surprise, though his expression was one of hope. "If you want the couch, it's yours, I wasn't using it much anyways and I'll put in for another." He paused, studying the white-haired man. "What kind of experience? Have you seen this before?"

"I specialise in species with multiple personalities housed within a single body. Trill especially due to your links with the past."

"I don't have a multiple personality disorder," Jeremy answered flatly, "I am my own person. Ezio doesn't interfere with what I do. He's always there and sometimes offers advice, but he doesn't interfere. I know about all of his past hosts, because I experienced the death of all of them when I was joined. But never before had any of them tried to take control of me."

"Yea, it's interesting, I've never had anyone to ask before but how do you find death? It's a most unusual sensation, I've been blown out into space, shot, stabbed, burnt, even eaten on one occasion..." his face seemed to turn a slightly green shade. "I had an entity put its arm though this body, my first strike as it were... messy."

Jeremy gave his visitor a pointed stare as if to say he was insane. "Death is final, and I have experienced various means of death, ranging from natural, to being assassinated. Most of them were very...unpleasant, shall we say? And Noah doesn't know the details, nor do I want him to know. He'd be worried for me forever, and might not let me out of our quarters again." He rolled his eyes at the very idea.

"Ah yes, the captain; I find boys are always very protective, I imagine the more pips the more that statement can be exaggerated." He puzzled over the idea for a few seconds. "Besides I think we're living proof that death is far from a finality, it's just the next step along the path; for some reason the universe wants us to stick around a bit longer."

"I am not my predecessors," Jeremy stated flatly, "I am my own person with my own memories to share, and to experience. And I want nothing more than for this mess to be solved, because I know this can go to look bad on Noah. And that's the last thing I want to happen. I know Ensign Wright may press charges, and I've tried to talk to him. Not to talk him out of it but to reassure him that he should do what he feels is right. I saw the bridge footage, and unfortunately, I remember now too. I feel terrible, and this again reflects back on Noah. I know he's worried for me..."

Jeremy paused, looking down at his hands. "I want to know how this happened, and how to prevent it. I never want this to happen again."

"Well then, we need to start pulling the incident apart." The counsellor mused as he stared up at the ceiling, his hands hovering oddly above his stomach as though expecting something to land unceremoniously upon it. "Let's start at the end and work backwards, everything is clearer that way, you'll see."

A little confused, Jeremy nodded, though he didn't seem too thrilled with having to drag up the already nasty memories yet again. "At the end.." Jeremy told him what he remembered, from end to beginning, leaving absolutely nothing out. On occasion he fell silent and his eyes unfocused for a moment as he communicated with his symbiont, who was very helpful in the memory department.

"I see, you said you left the bridge briefly. What compelled you to return?" Alex finding the incident curious.

"Duty." It was a simple enough answer, but it was honest. "And fear..fear for Noah. Fear I'd never see him again.." Again, pure honesty.

"Was it that fear that made you pull the weapon?"

"Possibly...I don't know. Maybe?" Jeremy looked at him, his eyes filled with question. "I think so," he finally added, after a brief hesitation. "I don't even know why I had it..I don't usually wear a phaser, I'm not a good shot at all..."

"Ensign Wright would agree with you." Alex finding it hard to let that one just pass him by. "But that is a commendable characteristic, weapons solve very little, if anything at all." He patted his chin thoughtfully with his Padd. "But even out of fear a person with very little weapons training wouldn't normally go for the trigger quite so quickly, if at all. You didn't think to try grappling with the XO first?"

"I didn't want to shoot him, or Ensign Wright at all sir," Jeremy answered softly, looking away, "I never meant to fire. I don't know why I took the phaser in the first place. I've tried to speak with Ensign Wright and I did apologize for shooting him. I also told him that if he wanted to press charges, I wouldn't argue them. All the same, I do hope he doesn't, but I've not tried to deter him."

"That's probably for the best, it never looks good on the record to be fair."

"What doesn't, sir?" Jeremey asked, genuinely not understanding.

"Trying to influence the other party. That is the tactic of a desperate man."

"I am a desperate man," Jeremy answered without hesitation, "I don't want to transfer, or leave starfleet. I want to stay here with my family. But I'm also an honest man...and a Starfleet officer. I'm not that desperate."

"Well then, I guess I best save your career then." Alex remarked.

"How would you do that?" Jeremy's question was a genuine one. "I don't know what to do sir, I'm really at a loss. I don't know how to prove that I never intended to fire, that I don't know why I had the phaser to begin with. I'm normally never armed, even Noah can testify that. Or anyone who knows me...Doctor D'BrooNi, Lieutenant Thorne...they could too..."

"The reason is plain to see, but not an option in your defence, it could shorten our life span somewhat."

In reflex, Jeremy folded his arms across his abdomen, shaking his head in horror. "No that's not an option. They can't take Ezio from me, we'd both die. But what are my options? You said your specialty is dealing with multiple personalities. How is this going to help me?"

"The problem is the multiple personalities. I know that the symbiosis committee will shout until blue in the face when it comes to previous hosts possessing a current body, but it does happen Jeremy; I have seen it, you can't lock multiple personalities into a single frame and expect them all to just get along."

"But can I prevent this? Or at least keep them at bay somehow?"

"There are ways yes, but we must keep this under wraps; they would no doubt blame the incident on your biology, and seek to remove the symbiont in order to hush this whole incident up."

Jeremy almost fainted. "What?" he whispered, barely able to breathe. He was frightened beyond belief. "They wouldn't do that...they'd kill us both... How do I keep this from happening again? Please, I must know..."

"Oh that is simple; this sort of thing becomes an issue when conflict over control reaches a peak. You have to get to know Ezio's previous hosts, let them surface now and again."

"Let them?" Jeremy couldn't quite believe that. "How?"

The counsellor smiled as his eyes shifted to a pleasant bottle green. "Ritual and repetition are the tools of the initiate." His voice now feminine in tone. "But after a while it will become second nature."

The younger man gawked as he did notice the shift of eyes. "That...that.." he stumbled over his own words. "Your eyes! That happened to me too...how'd you do that?"

"This is a trait commonly associated with my species, it makes it obvious as to who is in the driving seat as it were."

"Your species?" Jeremy stared openly at him in confusion. "But aren't you Human?"

"Not exactly."

"You look Human," the half-Trill concluded, "but what are you then? And how many of there are you? I mean...if there's more than one personality in you? And isn't that like, not quite the same as being Trill? I mean...I have Ezio, and he has all these memories..."

"Imagine carrying nine symbionts."

"I don't think that'd fit..." Jeremy studied his lean figure, probing his abdomen as he thought about it. "I think one'd look very very pregnant, or bloated, to be honest. I think one symbiont is quite enough, he's capable of making me sick too, with the moving he does sometimes. I think...I can quite relate on what a pregnant woman might feel like sometimes. Oh wait..." His eyes unfocused for a moment as Ezio helpfully dug up a memory of one of his past female hosts. "Ugh..."

"Oh that's fun." Alex too recalling such activities. "But I carry nine entities, each of which have inhabited numerous bodies, the oldest of the contingent is over nine-hundred years old."

"Heh...compared to that, Ezio must seem like a toddler to you. He's two-hundred fifty years old, and I'm just about one-tenth of that..." Jeremy smiled. "How do you cope? How do you control it?"

"We have a common goal; we are curious creatures who like to seek out all the new beauty in the universe, Alex lets us surface when we have to and actively consults us for advice." His left eye turned back to its original brown state. "It's common I let one of them sit in the background like this, I try to keep my head down though."

"So you're trying to say I should consult his past hosts more often? Or allow him to well..overwhelm me with their knowledge?" The latter didn't seem all that appealing to the young halfbreed.

"Not overwhelm no. It is important to remember that this is your body and your time in the universe, but it is important to embrace the knowledge of those that have gone before you. I can teach you, and you are more than capable of learning."

"I appreciate that," the younger counselor answered gratefully, "when do we start?"

"You have already taken your first step."

"Acknowledgement of their existance? Or accepting their existance? Because I had already done both...."

"Acknowledgement being the important of the two, you accept that they are there when you are joined, it takes more strength of character to acknowledge than just shunt them to one side."

"But the thing is, I've never shunned them. It's Ezio who chose not to share with me, after the initial joining nearly had me lose myself in their memories. So how do I learn to live with them, rather than just being shown when I need their help? I don't know everything that is to know about them, not by a long shot. And how do I keep their knowledge from clouding my own experience or judgement?"

"You would be surprised by the number of Trill that do. Symbionts are somewhat of a cultural status boost after all. As miraculous an individual I am I cannot answer your question a single sentence, but I can however show you the rituals and techniques my people have used for centuries to take advantage of such gifts. Perhaps the secret is not to know the answers right from the start but to figure them out for yourself along the way."

"I think that's a very good place to start from," Jeremy agreed with a smile. "And I don't see it as a cultural status boost at all. I'm still shunned, I think as far as the Symbionsis Commission is concerned, I don't exist. Perhaps...Commander Grayson can use some of his influence to get an answer? I'd really like to know why they never got in contact."

"Perhaps it is a blessing in disguise."

"Why would it be? They owe me... If they had helped me when I needed it most, perhaps now I wouldn't have been in this mess. I'm really nervous of what'll happen. I don't want to lose my commission, and I don't want to leave the Archimedes."

"Then we have little time to lose."

Jeremy sighed. "We have no time to lose. I don't know if there'll be a trial, I don't know if Ensign Wright will press charges or not, and I feel terrible because all of this will no doubt come back to bite Noah in the ass, and that's the last thing I want to happen. He's worked so hard to get this command... not that I wanted any of this to happen to begin with..." He was remorseful to the bone, his sincerity couldn't be questioned, nor his honesty.

"Then to a holodeck we must go, be a gent and lead the way."

The half-Trill rose from his seat and led the white-haired counselor to the nearest holodeck. "What do you have in mind?" he asked nervously.

"Your salvation."

 

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